Thursday, July 29, 2010

When might you go to the internet for advice rather than asking your friends or family?

To be honest I always go to the internet first for advice. As crazy as it may seem I always seem to get a varied range of answers that really make me think, also people on the internet do not know you personally so they don't judge you. I find family and friends have that extra judging and highground attitude when giving you advice - they can also be a bit biased with you or harsh with you. Whereas online it is always neutral, and if you are going online to read advice then you are just informing yourself. I am a bit of a drama queen and find I have problems ';a lot'; lol and I find the internet good for moaning and reading about issues etc rather than annoying and nagging my friends or family.When might you go to the internet for advice rather than asking your friends or family?
I think you'd rathger ask strangerrs about certain things because it might alianate people you know.

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When might you go to the internet for advice rather than asking your friends or family?
Sometimes, you might find that the question you want an answer to,is a bit difficult to ask people you know directly; either because it's embarrassing, or because it sounds silly, although you want an answer to them, or because you think that being close to you, they won't dare being honest with you.


Also, on the internet, there are a wide range of opinions there; and surely, you'd feel safer to go with the majority, as the majority is usually right.


Internet gives you anonymity and although it can be pretty hurtful to be judged by people who don't know you, you feel less of an idiot for not being exposed to the ones who know you and can be horrible to you to your face.
I always go to the internet for advice because of the fact that I can't talk to other people about stuff. Its just not me. I hate how everyone seems to think that everyone else should be able to talk to people about stuff, because its like, some people just are not like that and its not fair to expect them to be. Other reasons are basically that its anonymous. The internet people don't know who you are, they know nothing about you and they can't already have judgements on you. They take the situation for what it is. This can also be a problem too though seen as they don't know what kind of person you are so they may not know what kind of advice to give you, but its normally not that way..





No one knows who you are here. Thats basically why I go here.
when its something that can be sorted whn you don;t want your family to know or when you feel that it will make it worse by telling family. For instance, self harm, a lot of people prefer to go to the interenet to get suppot and advice becasue they can get help from people who may have gone through tha same thing as they did. There is another reason, to get help fom people who may hvae gone through the same things as you. O maybe you don't feel you can trust your friends and family and do not feel that they will take your problems seriously.
Some ';SITES'; only offer help to people under 25 years of age...!





Some people don't want family to know their personal and private business. So seeking the advice of neutral parties on the internet would retain a certain element of dignity and anonymity.





Friends and family are more likely to give you ';advice'; based on their knowledge of you.. .they are inclined to give you the answers you might want to hear.





On sites like this one, our questions are met with varied responses based on ';hands on'; experience. We all know we aren't to take anyone's advice as the ';be all and end all'; effective remedy. .. in the end it's up to us to ascertain a feasible and logical approach to our dilemma's, based on the cumulative and diverse recommendations made by others.
I would do this if I was certain that non of my family friends or relatives knew the answer, or when I wanted a totally unbiased opinion on the question.


Sometimes family and friends can be too ' involved ' to offer help and advise that would be practical and or useful, or may even have an agenda of their own which means that the advice offered may not be the best, quite simply because it would compromise their own position or situation.


Fortunately, I have only found myself in this position twice, and on both occasions received helpful advice that could be used then, and also stored to pass on to othe Y.A. members who asked similar questions.


Mike t.
For a start it's easier to type out my feelings rather than trying to explain them.





As well it doesn't matter who sees your question or your feelings on the internet, no-one will ever know who you are so you can be honest and you don't have to be embarassed.





If things don't go how you expect in front of your friends and family it isn't something you just forget, you'll be reminded of it. And there's some things you just don't want people knowing about you, no matter who they are.
I always go to friends first for advice, the internet second, and family as a last resort.


Friends are obviously more supportive than the internet ever could be, but the internet has much more information and you can be anonymous.


I use the internet for topics that i feel too embarrassed to bring up with family or friends, or for advice i know they wont be able to give me!
When I don't want to name names.


If its an issue concerning someone I work with, for example, and I don't want one of my friends or colleagues to ask or try to guess who I'm refferring to, I will turn to a community site for advice so that I can just say ';I'm having concerns about someone I know'; and the people contributing don't have to judge or worry about who I'm talking about, they can just advise me based on their own experiences.


If I start it up with someone I know in person, then there's a chance it might backfire or erupt into an even more complicated issue, so I use sites like this to avoid unneccessary complications.
Sometimes asking family and friends can bring an answer that is biased. Because family members and friends know you, their answers may not be as honest as you would like. Posting your question on a site such as this gives you the opportunity of looking at a range of answers. But do be careful as some people have an axe to grind and sometimes an answer can be so hurtful.
i go to the net for all kinds of problems or questions! not so much for advice as such but it can be a good way to see how other people have dealt with certain situations, or give you a difference perspective to look at things. talking to your friends and family about your problems is good, but on the net you can search for how people who have been or are going through the same thing as you feel, or have dealt with things. Good Luck!
I am a private person, so when I have a marital problem, I never violate the sanctity of my marriage by talking about my problems with my family or friends. I never want my family or friends to ';dislike'; or lose respect for my husband based on what I may say in ';the heat of the moment';.....hurt and anger and frustration seem to make us over exaggerate a problem and then our friends and family choose sides that they should never have to choose.


And ';telling'; on my husband, is not allowing him to share his side of the issue.....and that is unfair and diesrespectful.


So it is easier to ask faceless strangers about a problem to obtain an objective answer or advice.
When i want to be unknown but most of the times,i look for help on the internet rather than my family and friends cause my family are always out and hardly ever see them.Friends because i dont trust people.I once do,however,the trust for everybody was broken when one of my friends shared my problems(secrets,rather) with everybody.


People on the net doesnt know you,they cant judge you.
As many people already mentioned, confiding in perfect strangers help you to get an objective solution. They are not personally involved in the situation and can therefore think straight - something that family and friends can't do because they know you.





There can be some judgemental characters on your internet sites but more often than not people are genuinely helpful.
I agree with the first answer, when you want to be anonymous. I was dealing with some stuff that I knew I couldn't share with my husband and I confided in one friend and she just blew it off and acted like I just needed to stop my behavior...she gave me no advice. I found myself, actually, at this site and just put it out there. I could say exactly what I was going through and what I was feeling. I got good honest answers from people that didn't know me. And it helped, it helped me alot. I feel alot better and am thankful that I had the internet as an outlet.
There are many reasons.





One could be that it is about them! Either in something they do or how they might react to something I did.





Other things might be on something that I know they will know nothing about, such as advice on a bit of homework.





And of course, the other reason is just to get the advice from an impartial source.
Because family tend to judge you and share your worries/secrets with whoever they live with which ain't fair. Some people tend to think they have to share everything with their partners even if it's about someone else which is wrong. Here people may judge you but you don't know each other and will never so they just judge once and forget about it and move on to the next question





xx
so you can choose to be anonymous.


so that you can get a better understanding of a situation that you might be being biased about so that you dont hurt someone you care about by not understanding.


so that other people who search online for something similar can use the answers to your questions to help them
theres soo many reasons...





when you don't want anyone to know who you are...


when you are too embarrassed to ask friends or family...


when friends and family don't understand or won't understand...


when you don't have friends or family to ask...


Its easier to talk to people on the internet coz they don't know you so they can't judge you...
some questions a person can't ask he/her parents about and so he/she can go to the internte for help, but what the person should remember that the people replying are just random people form all over the world and so before choosing the 'best' advice they should evaluate it first.
i always doo, its a lot easier talking to people you dont know , and a lot less awkward too. alsso, when it's something you'd be embarassed to tell people you know or even, you just want to find someone that understands what you're getting at





or you want a range of answers





etc. :]
When you want the opinion of someone who isn't biased, who doesn't know you so they don't mind 'hurting' your feelings, who take the time and explain, they dont know you so they cannot judge it from your character, and mostly because they give their honest opinion. When people who we know will just tell us what we want to hear.


That's why.


:) x
you might be embarressed or uncomfortable talking about your problem theres a certain anominity on the internet so people might be more comfortable talking about it plus online theres a chance a professional in whatever field reads your problem and helps you with it or someone whos had the same problem could read it and help
If it's a matter of a 'personal' nature, I'd much rather ask people on the internet anonymously, than face people I know. I'd rather not have the people I know judge me and think any worse of me by asking for such advice.
sometimes it is so good to scream at the computer screen when you don't get the answers you want. Or shut up suddenly because of the answers you do get. It doesn't matter what you ask someone somewhere will have an opinion. Maybe it is nice to be lonely but ...not alone.
Hey bud,





Anonymity, and for a totally unbiased view-point, also a view beyond those of people who may be involved directly or indirectly, or if I wanted as broader view as possible relative to a question.





thanks for your question and take care.
if this question is embarrassing and personal ,if its a question that can't be answered by family , friends . sometimes it helps speaking to somebody that u don't have a relationship with i think this way can really help
When it's about people i know. rumors spread pretty fast and i wouldn't want my friends and family getting the wrong idea about certain questions i have. Plus, people on here don't really judge all that much. We are all here for the same reason; we need help.
When you hear the same type of advice all the time, and you need someone else's input. Someone not from the inside, and not someone who already has your own personal opinions on the subject to influence their answer.
When you want someone's opinion who isn't involved in the situation, so that the advice is impartial. It can give you a different view point on the situation without upsetting or offending anyone.
easier you ask everybody that you don't know.


but i better ask for advices to the family, then you could find a solution for the problems.
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