Separated family, advice please?

hi there I am in need of some good advise. I am separated from my husband due to him being abusive and his parents being abusive with me and am waiting to finalise the divorce. We have been separated 8 months and we have two daughters together, an 9 mnth old and 2 yr old. He didnt bother with them for so long and has just started seeing them one day a week now. I just dropped them off then and it will be the first time he is having them overnight. We nearly got into an argument because last week one of them was sick so I said he couldnt have them coz he would complain and today he said if I miss out one of his days again he is taking me to court about it. I did it in best interest for the kids and I hate the thought of the kids being with him, Im scared he is going to turn them against me, he is a very spiteful man and I'm worrying I'm doing the right thing. I'm just having a hard time with the thought of them being with him, please advise me.Separated family, advice please?
He only has them one day a week, stick with the agreement before he takes you to court for more, he has rights and will definantly get more visitation if not joint custody. Unless you can prove he is abusing or neglecting them there isn't much you can do.Separated family, advice please?
Make sure that you go to the doctor with them and get a letter which states the doctor's orders for them not to go out and to stay indoors, and that means with you.





If he takes you to court, show the MD letter and tell the judge he is abusing you for not being reasonable with this and he is inconsiderate of their well- being.





Husband (ex to be) will most likely give you all sorts of problems in the future untiul he has a giufrglfriends, and he is pissed that you have rejecte43d him. My ex doid it to me, and then, after I discoreed whe was acarrying someone lese's fetus, I rehjjected her, and then,m the new dad dumped her forcing her to abort which I proved.








It's messu. However, I made sure,m no matter what, I have avoided nearly all contact with my ex now into its 17th year, a great move, beleive me, but it is not always possible.





Make sure everything and I mean everything is dealt with in a divorce agreement. Read The Divorce Handbook, and do NOT leave out anything which may happen in the future no matter how insignificant it appears now.
There isn't much you can do. Children have hard lives being raised with parents in different homes. The bottom line is that he is their father and it's his right to have time with them, by law. You really can't do anything about it. This is the price you are paying for having babies wiht a man who is spiteful and mean.
i work in these kinds of situations all the time. i doubt a judge will take your kids and place them with your husband for a minor thing like that. He is jut trying to hold that over your head and be a jerk to you. I don't think he will be able to poison your kids against you either. If he has them for one day a week, he doesn't have time. Your girls will eventually one day see him for what he is.
Well he is their father and he has a right to see and spend time with them so hopefully you can both get along for the sake of the babies!Good Luck
Well if you didnt see this behavior by the time the first child came along Im assuming you did by the second one. So you made the choice as to who their father was. He doesn't always have to be a part of you life, but he does theirs so maybe you should have thought about this a while before kids were involved. If he is abusive to the kids then the courts will not allow him to see them but if not. He does have a right to them. You'd probably kill someone if you said they couldnt be around them right? You telling him that he couldnt see them when they are sick is not for their best intrest. Your their parent and nurse them back to health...so why can't he. I know its hard I really do. My oldest two children are not my husbands children and its hard when they see their dad. Of course you feel like no one can take care of them as good as you can and its hard to deal with, but Im sure he does a very good job with them. If he doesnt you will see signs and then you should report them to the courts BUT ONLY REAL SIGNS. Your kids will hate you and YOU will turn them against yourself if you try and stand in the way. Kids will make up their own minds later on in life no matter what he says to them.
One single person can't change anyone else. He can't change the opinions of your children. You are their mother, and they love you. They feel the same way about their father, and you can't keep them from him. Just because he is a certain way with you, doesnt mean he will be that way with your girls. Keep a watchful eye on him though.. and good luck